Healing Myself

by Amanda Bonar


For over 10 years I suffered with painful swollen joints, oppressive fatigue, and other symptoms. One doctor insisted it was Lyme disease; another diagnosed thyroid ailments, etc., etc. ad nauseum.

One day I noticed that in addition to these other symptoms, the skin on my hands (my most important part because I am an artist) started to peel away and became cracked and would sometimes bleed.

As time went on it appeared on my head, elbows, and other areas. Doctors diagnosed “dermatitis,” “eczema,” etc. Finally I was sent to a rheumatologist who diagnosed “rheumatoid arthritis.” It was so bad I had to quit my job as a teacher, which I loved.

I went through the usual battery of tests and x-rays, and started on the usual treatment for autoimmune disorders. Which was fine and seemed to help.

Then, during my treatments one day, a care provider remarked that patients usually required medications for the rest of their lives. Somewhat dismayed, I thought to myself that this is not what I want to live with.

I began to ask myself, “Why have I manifested this disease?” Shortly thereafter, with meditation, I realized that my body was crying out that my spirit needed attention. Unless this was attended to, I would continue to decline.

Alarmed, I soon realized I was being called to change my path and do what I was meant to do. With some trepidation I began to express myself without suppressing who I am, without guild or worry. I allowed myself to be myself. I am enough.

Over a short period of time, while continuing my treatments, I began to improve. After more time, I was able to come off all medication for my arthritis and all with my doctor’s approval. He was amazed.

I continue to be a practicing artist and find if I neglect this my symptoms reappear (though in a milder form). And they go away when I use my hand to express myself.

My spirit and mind is truly my builder and when I listen to it, I am the person I am meant to be.


About the author:

Amanda (Mindy) has been an artist/art educator for 25+ years; kindergarten-12th grade and Adult. She is currently a producing artist/potter. She teaches workshops to adults and is a member of the Foothills Craft Guild and Appalachian Arts Craft Center. Website is This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Mindy is the mother of one daughter and two sons, wife of one (30 years). “Family is my true life work.” Involved in Cayce work since 1980. Interested in mind/body connection to self- healing since having experienced this personally.

Mindy is the East Tennessee State greeter and Core Team member since 2011.

She loves to read, scrapbook, and garden.

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